I have been with my boyfriend for almost 5 years now. We have been living together for 3 years. High school sweethearts. We have one child together. When i got pregnant it was a surprise, I decided to keep the baby and told him to leave or stay. He wanted to stay. He said he wanted to get married sometime soon after the baby was born to make sure we were still doing well together and that we could make this family work. I agreed. I was not wanting to get married while pregnant but my son is now 11 months and still no ring. I have talked to him about it and all he says is it will happen... As my friends get engaged and married I just sit by and start to feel hatred towards my boyfriend. I go to school, I clean the house, do the laundry, cook dinner, take care of our child... and I am not good enough to have an engagement ring to start to plan our wedding and life together as a real family. I love him very much but I feel like what the hell? Why are all these other girls, boyfriends so good to them that they make them an honest woman? I dont know if he is procrasnating or just never gonna ask. His mother had 4 divorces and he thinks marriage is something u do when everything is perfect. I know that isnt true? Im i just nieve? My parents have been together no divorce for 25 years and they are 40 years old.. Are we too young for marriage at 21? I also think he is upset because Im the only one he has had sex with maybe he thinks Im ruining his childhood?
I do think that 21 is young, but I also think that having a baby changes everything and instantly takes you into being an adult. If you're starting to resent him and you're feeling bad about yourself, then it may be time to find someone else.
If he's waiting for a perfect time to be married, then that will never happen. Maybe his mom being divorced so many times has clouded his view of marriage. Who knows? The important thing is that if you are ready for marriage and you think that there is a fair chance that he is truly anti-marriage, then you should consider finding a man that will truly commit to you. If having a child wasn't enough to convince him to marry you, then I don't think that there is anything that you can do that will be more persuasive.
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