A while back on LuvemOrLeavem we had a debate over relationship cliches, and the one that caused the most uproar was “the way to a man’s heart is through his stomach.” Things started to get ugly as men posted about how it important it was to them that their future wife was a good cook. Some women thought these men were living in the past and were stuck on an outdated notion that “a woman’s place is in the kitchen.”
Luckily, we had some brave men who confessed that they felt most loved by their wives when they took the time to prepare a nice meal for them and that changed the tone of the discussion. Now it turns out that most women did the cooking in their relationships, and it was more the expectation that women should be able to cook more than the actual cooking that riled up these women. This brings me to today’s interview with Nadia G from The Bitchin’ Kitchen web tv show. Nadia is the embodiment of the attitude that our women expressed about cooking. They didn’t mind it as long as their efforts were met with love and appreciation rather than a pile of shirts to iron once the dinner dishes were cleaned and put away. So here is what the Nadia G had to say when we spoke to her about love and cooking:
LuvemOrLeavem: We’ve had huge debates about love and food, how important is it that a woman can cook?
Nadia: As an Italian I’m convinced that they way to anyone’s heart is through their stomach. Honestly, I think the ability to whip up a great meal is a definite asset. See, humans aren’t super complex creatures: a good meal can get you what ever you want. A great meal guarantees it.
Luvem: How can a woman make sure that cooking a special meal for her guy isn’t a green light for him to expect elaborate meals every day?
Nadia: I’ve always enjoyed spoiling my past boyfriends with a coupla stellar meals here and there, but they’ve never expected it on a daily basis. If your man expects an extravagant meal every day, and has the audacity to badger you about it, always remember that there are other uses for a wooden spoon.
Luvem: What about those women who can’t cook? Any tips on getting started?
Nadia: Being able to cook for yourself is so important, especially with all the crappy food that’s out there: additives, hormones, whopping amounts of sodium, saturated fats and sugar… Cooking is easy, all one has to do pick-up a cookbook and be willing to get their hands dirty, no need to be intimidated by food. So what if you mess up? But if she really has no interest in rocking her kitchen, then I say try to buy organic prepped food as much as possible. At least you know the meals don’t contain any nasty surprises.
Luvem: For those take-out women, should they be honest or try to pass off this food as their own?
Nadia: I say: be honest. Lying takes too much energy, and at the end of the day, people don’t really care where the food comes from as long as it’s tasty.
Luvem: What about men in the kitchen? How do you get him to do something beyond using the microwave?
Nadia: I hear you, it ain’t easy to get someone to start cooking… I’d say go Pavolvian on his butt. Good meal, he gets a treat… No meal, no treat. Nothing like “positive” reinforcement, mwahahahaha!
Valentine’s Day Cooking- Since many of our readers have told us that tight budgets will have them cooking on Valentine’s Day, here are Nadia’s top suggestions:
Top suggestion for women to make: Men like meat, so I’d suggest she make him the Filet Mignon with Coco-Chili Sauce for Valentine’s Day
Top suggestion for men to make: Women LOVE chocolate so I suggest he make her some dessert, maybe a Chocolate Fondue with salty pretzels.
Luvem: Should your Vday meal vary based on the stage of your relationship? For example, 1) newly dating 2) dating for a while 3) where the heck is my ring?
Nadia: 1) If you’re dating someone new, this is the time to bamboozle them. I’d say go all out with a 3 course V-Day dinner of Panko Shrimp & Strawberries, Filet Mignon with a maple Balsamic Reduction, and Spicy Dark Chocolate Soufflés for dessert…
2) If you’ve been dating for a while, there’s nothing like snuggling up to some comfort food: elevate a shepherd’s pie with ground organic sirloin, fresh grilled corn, and mix of sweet n’ russet potato mash. Top with smoked paprika, amp up some ketchup with hot sauce, and man, you’ve got yourself a party.
3) Where the heck is my ring? LOL. If you can’t get him to buy the ring, you may as well get him to buy you dinner. Head to a 5-star resto and shkoff on his tab.
Luvem: What is your opinion of famous women in the kitchen (Julia Child, Martha Stewart, Rachel Ray)? Are they role models for women or old fashioned stereo types?
Nadia: Julia Child and Martha Stewart are pioneers, they built empires on what was once considered mere “women’s work”, and you gotta give them props for that. I respect Rachael Ray, although she’s a bit too saccharine for my taste: Cooking up nachos for your husband’s Super Bowl party? Yea OK. In my book, I’d ship him off to a sports bar and have my girlfriends over for a make-your-own-spring roll/ gossip party. She’s got her thing, I’ve got mine.
Luvem: It sounds like you have recipes for every time in a relationship including breaking up and making up. What is your favorite relationship themed recipe?
Nadia: My uncle Pasqua used to say: There’s a meal for every occasion and an occasion for every meal…” No one was ever more right (or sweaty.) Its hard for me to single out a meal/ theme… But if I really have to: I’d go with the Break Up Meal. It’s good to leave ‘em with a good taste in their mouth, remember you once cared for them, but more importantly: they know your secrets and probably got ‘em on tape…
As you can probably tell from her answers, Nadia has a non-intimidating and fun approach to cooking. Her recipes are delicious, but not too complicated and her show is filled with humor. After all where else can you find a cooking show that exclaims that its low fat meal has “less fat than Nicole Richie in a sauna?” So go visit Nadia over at the Bitchin’ Kitchen.
How about you? Do you like to cook for that special someone or are you just fine with take out? Better yet, do you have a special someone who cooks for you? Please share your thoughts in our comments section.
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I love that we live an era where women are educated, independent, and can wait to marry until they find a man they love rather than needing to find a husband to support them. Despite how important it is for a women to be be choosy when deciding who to date, there is a point when a woman can be “too picky.” If you find yourself with a ten page check list, then it’s likely you have switched from searching for the “perfect man for you” to searching for absolute perfection.
